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This day's oh so boring.

I woke up at 10, watched the telly, had lunch, watched the telly again, had Halo-Halo for merienda, slept, woke up, took a bath, surfed the net. Eeeerr. I already turned off the computer moments ago.. but since I am not yet sleepy, I opened it again. Hahaha. Fudge. Can't wait till mom arrives then we're off to Puerto Galera. Hmmmm.

Glorietta tomorrow! I'm gonna watch a Fashion Show. I got free tickets from my designer eh. :D

See you, Issa bitch. =)

Last night was a blast even if I didn't have a date! Haha. The event was supposed to start by 6pm.. But yeah, Filipino time eh! So it started at 7 something instead. There was a red carpet, media something.. blah. Stuff you usually see in Hollywood events. ;P I loved everything.. my make-up and hairstyle plus my gown. :)) It wasn't really that WOAH. Twas color red with some black. The theme was Hollywood so yeah, it was long! Almost all my friends stepped on(?) it. HAHAHA.

Damn, Kei wore a gown! Couldn't imagine her wearing such at first. ;P Tinalo pa niya hairstyle at make-up ko kagabi eh! Hihi. Her nails and toenails had nail polish, too. Girlalooo.. :)) Your date sucks, btw. You should have given me your 1700 instead. I could've bought three pieces of clothes already! Sayang.

Yana's date last night was.. can I say hot? :P Shehet. Sizzling hot eh! Fuck. I looove him. Haha. I'm kidding.

I left by 12mn. I wanted to stay pa, but I couldn't since my sundo was already there.. :))

Pictures here. Those are just some of the many pictures we took. I didn't have a camera, so I used my phone lang. Most of the pictures are still with Lara. Upload na, babe! =))

Prom tomorrow.

Eksayted na meee! ;P

I'm missing him.. :( Fucking seriously.

Yeah whatever, it's all my fault. ALL MINE. Letting him go is just so stupid of me. I know how much he loved and still loves me. But ugh, I'm just plain stupid!! REALLY. Last night, he asked me if I still love him.. And you know what I said? "Ewan.." Hay.. Then by 3 in the morning, I received a text from him. I won't mention whatever the text says anymore. It's kinda long although it's the sweetest message I ever received from him. O basta, the line which I really liked was, "Ewan ko ba kung bakit ang lakas ng tama ko sa'yo." Yun yun eh. His simple hirits which I really love and appreciate. Makes me miss him moreeeee! :(

YOU: If ever you'll be able to read this.. I hope you know that I really have loved and still feels the same for you. I know I wasn't good enough for you and yet, you were always there to make me feel loved. I admit that during those almost two months of being together, I wasn't really that fair to you. I was the one who kept on getting mad because of the littlest things. Geez. I just really love you, babe! :( I'll always feel that way for you. Please always remember that.

I don't care how far you are from me or how longs it's been since we've talked. I dont care how mad I got at you or how mad you've been at me. You're still what matters most to me and I will never be able to give that up.

I shall get my gown for the prom later.. Wee. :]


I have something to share! Read, honey. :)


Here's to all the girls who used to be his number one. The ones who waited all night for him to call, only to check the caller ID the next morning & be disappointed. The ones who made it through that bitter break up, dried your own tears, & moved on with your life, only to have him walk back in it months later like nothing ever happened. Those of you who cried on the first day you talked again because you knew exactly where this phone call was going. The ones who listened to him say, "I only want to be your friend", one day, and the next, listened to him say how much he loves & misses you. We deserve something, and this is our tribute. Here's to the ones that took him back, hoping that maybe this time, he was different, hoping that maybe people really do change. We listened to our friends tell us that we were stupid for even thinking about giving him another chance, caught crap from our parents, & even snuck around to see him for while. We went through the great stage with no fights all over again. We started this out thinking it would be just friends, & ended up falling in love with him again. We wanted nothing more in the world than to hear him tell us he loved us too, that even though things were bad in the past, they would be different this time. And when we finally heard it, it was like we were dreaming. This is for us. Here's to the ones who believed what he said, sat around all over again waiting for a phone call that might come in a few hours, or a few days. Here's for the tears cried and dried all over again. We wanted so desperately to believe that he was really busy, he couldn't possibly call us at that moment, or even that he fell asleep early. We trained ourselves to believe the lies because we wanted to believe we had found the one for us. We learned to settle for someone who didn't treat us the way we should be treated. Here's for the ones who did their hair and make up & put on their prettiest earrings, only to hear him say that he couldn't see us today. The ones who never believed it when people told us there might be someone else. We just couldn't believe that he could do this to us again. This is for those great girls who loved him more than words can say, & took him back no matter what happened last time because they couldn't bear to look back on their lives one day & wonder "what if". This is for the girls that stayed up all night long listening to him whine about an ex girlfriend who cheated on him, & cried during the entire conversation. The ones who hoped he would realize that he deserved better, that he deserved us. When he said that he loved you, but he was in love with her, he didn't mean it. This is for the ones that held on to something that was never there to begin with. This is for us girls, who somehow managed to get him to forget about her, & get him to tell us that he was in love with us again, only to have him tell us three weeks later that "things were going too fast, he needs time." Here's to the girls who couldn't cry to their friends because of how stupid they felt. The ones who held it all in when things came crumbling to pieces again. This is for the ones who couldn't bear to even tell their mom what was going on, for fear of an "I told you so." The ones that could just tell that they had made a mistake ever allowing him into their hearts & their dreams again. We knew that we deserved better the entire time, that we deserved a guy who would call when he said he was going to, one that would come see us whenever he got the chance, one that would really care about us. We just wanted the one that we loved like that. Here's for the ones that finally realized that he never gave a crap about them. Here's for the time that he broke your heart again. This is for those days spent trying to hold back the tears, & the tears that turned into anger, then disappointment. Here's for us girls who finally realized that we deserve better. This is for those confusing days, when you miss him & want nothing more than to hear his voice, or feel his arms around your waist. Stay strong and remember that relationships are like broken glass; sometimes it's better to leave it alone rather than try to put the pieces back together & get hurt. Remember the times you cried & how long it took you to even be able to look at another guy like that. When 'your song' comes on the radio, turn the station. When the day comes that he realizes what a mistake he made & tries calling, turn your phone off. When he tries coming to your house, don't answer the door. Think of the broken promises, and the lies, the manipulation & the tears, the wasted moments and staying up all night wondering where the crap he was. Think of how your heart used to jump when your phone would vibrate in the middle of the night & how it fell to your stomach when you saw it wasn't him, and realized that once again, he hadn't called when he said he was going to. One day you'll find a guy who's worth all the tears, but he won't make you cry. You may think that you'll never care about someone like you did that guy that you always ran back to, but you will. It's going to hurt like crap, & it's going to need time to heal, but the point is, it will heal. This is for those girls who fell back in love with their ex, only to get hurt all over again.

I'm bored. :| Well, I always am. Teehee.


This week wasn't really boring.. It was kinda fun, actually.


MONDAY
Geom and Fil exams. Yaaay. No more Geom! :))


TUESDAY
Social Studies exam. Twas a bit hard. I didn't get to memorize all the terms kasi eh. Hihi.


WEDNESDAY
Chem and CL exams. Eaaaaaaseeh, babeh. HAHA. Last day of Junior Year, btw. Super happppppppy! :) :) :D Golda's birthday, too! :) We were supposed to go Yellow Cab Katip but since the guards saw us, we weren't able to. Grr. Boo. We had the pizza delivered instead. By 3pm, we(Moi, Issa plus Kamae) were on our way to Kamae's house already. Stayed there until 830.


THURSDAY
Went to the mall with my granny. ;D


FRIDAY
Clearance Day. Didn't go to school anymore since I'm already cleared. Went to the derma with Issa after lunch. After spending two and a half hours at the derma, went to Marikina naman. We had our dinner there.


SATURDAY
Just stayed at hoooome! :|


And today.. I still didn't go out. Rahr. Sooooooooooooooo effing boring.

HEY GUYS. This is Kamae. I'm using Dessa's blog because I want to, and she can't stop me from doing so. Well then let me start by greeting you guys good afternoon. I'm here at Dessa's place and I don't wanna go home.. :c You know why? Because I'm so freaking depressed. My mom would scold me almost everyday, my father gets home late, my little brothers always tease me, the maids are such whores. :)) Joke. And nobody calls me at home, except for that darn guy. I always call him because it's an impulse. He also said that he was making a project with his classmates. But then suddenly, I heard a voice of a flirty girl calling him. "KIANA.. KIANA" And I was like, "who's that?!" He was like, "my classmate.. I'm about to go home." So, I was like, "k bye. :|" Then after that, I hung up the phone. WHAT A DAMN BOYFRIEND. Is he even a boyfriend? Oh well.. It was around 10:30 and he wasn't texting yet. At 10:45, he used another phone and said, "we're still making the project. I love you and I miss you babe -Kiana Baby Bubu." I replied, "Kiana Baby Bubu? Haha. Idts." Btw, IDTS means I don't think so. Hahaha. Poor you if you don't know that. :)) At around 12, he texted me and said he just got home. I swore to myself that I won't text nor call him until the next day.. which is today, actually. =)) But then again, I'm always the STUPID and MARTYR girl. So, I'm just stupid. Bye, niggas.

--This is me already!

Teehee. Kamae left an hour ago.. Maybe she's already home now. Well, whatever. I'm still waiting for her text, though.

We had our last "formal" class in English, Geom, Social Studies and THE a while ago. I loved what Miss Lin told us. It's like this.. everytime the bell rings and our English class ends, instead of saying "Good bye and thank you," she'd say, "See you tomorrow 3-7!" It's really like that everyday. But a while ago when the bell rang, which signaled the end of English class, she said, "Goodbye and thank you 3-7!" Aww. It's just so sad to know that it'd be our last English class as Juniors. Time indeed flies so fast. :|

Geometry was our second subject. We had a quiz, then that's it. Sir Gerald didn't even bother to say a simple goodbye or thank you. Why's he like that? I wonder.

Sir Jeff's the sweetest teacher eveeer! He made a letter for our class and he read it in front of us. It was just so touching and sweet, and everything! I wish that he'll be our Economics teacher next year. He's really super patient and nice! :D He also let us hear a song entitled "Remember Me This Way." We took pictures with him! :D Nicenice. I love ya, Sir. :)

After SS was Recess time, then Club something. It was boring, except when several clubs performed. Hehe. Sayawatha's performance was the bomb! :))

Lunch. Then, THE followed. We didn't have the Open-house anymore; we'll have it on Mon-Wed instead. The LT was fucking uncool. It was so looooooong! We also had our Diagnostic Test in THE after the LT. We took it for only 20 or 25 mins! Bwaaha. Hula-hula na lang eh. Hehe. Uhm, then Sir Basti told us that he won't be teaching anymore. He's going to the States with his family.. Sad? I know. :(

A lot of things happened today.. Some were fun, and some weren't. I'm glad that the hell weeks are "temporarily" over. But then again, I'll surely miss those weeks of cramming, procrastinating, whatsoever. And of course, I'll miss my teachers too! Especially Sir Dayag. But I'll see him next week naman eh.

Good night, loves. :)

UGH! Drrrr.

I'm so pissed off right now. :| If it wasn't because of that grade those two other teachers gave me, I could have passed the Oral Defense!! GRRRRRR. From 37.33, it lowered down to 31.17. A point or two na lang.. Tsktsk.

But anyway.. what else can I do? Hmp.

THE Open-house tomorrow!

School was not fun.. It was SUPEEEEEEER fun! :))

First subject was English. Defense, mehn. Yana's finally done! Yay. ;D Next was Geom.. which was really boring. Ugh. Then, Social Studies after. Discussion as usual. :)) I finally had written notes. Haha, kudos to me. =)) Coz really, I'm too lazy and uninterested na in copying the notes.. :)) Too long, I swear. :)) Afterwhich was Recess, then Chem. We got to know our LT2 results. And as expected, I flunked it. 3 points na lang pasado na eh. Oh well. After Chem was PE! We had the whole period sa MMJ Field, that's why we were able to play Agawan Base, Ice Ice Water and Patintero. LOVEEEE! Teehee. PE was followed by Lunch, then Fil, then Guidance. Ayun.

Last PE and Guidance class. :( Wala ng Guidance Class next year.. HMP.

School was.. fun? :)) Haha, enough said. :)

It's 12 today.. :)) Hmmmm. Talk about first love. I miss.. everyone! =))

I remembered something. Hahahaa. It's really funny. :)) "Mahal kita, mahal mo siya. Ang sakit, di ba?" -Sir Gerald Hahaha.

I`ve accepted that we can`t be, but I`ve also accepted that you`re going to be that one person I carry with me for the rest of my life, the one that`s always going to make my heart jump a little & my stomach tie up in knots & you`ll always be able to make me happy ; no matter how long it`s been.

It's Sunday again.. Then, school tomorrow. Ughhh. A week and three days more before vacation starts. Can't wait much. :))

I might take Basketball lessons on summer. ;) I really really have to lose weight. Teehee. Then dance lessons, too. Wee. K. Okay na ko nito.. Haha.

I'm downloading songs right now. Simply because I'm really bored. :)) There are lots of requirements to finish, though. Many pages of El Filibusterismo to read.. Many names to memorize for Social Studies.. And finally, many formulas to master for Chemistry and Geom. :))

Did I mention that I'm bored? Hmm. Bwahaha.

Nobody understands how much I miss you, I miss how much we used to talk, & miss all the things we used to do. I try not to admit it to myself that I still feel this way. Nobody knows that I still wake up thinking of you each day. I still think of you & I really do miss you. I would give up everything I have to be everything we`re not.

I want you to know that I love you. I never did stop. Not for one gasping second. My love for you is unconditional & it will never end as long as I live. I refuse to find others when I have the one I want. I never doubted us, but you did. I never stopped thinking about you even though you stopped thinking about me. I never wanted to let go, but you did. I would go through anything just to be in your arms again.

We were supposed to be three months today.. :(

I wanna watch Music and Lyrics.. :(

I love its Soundtrack! :) :)



I’ve been living with a shadow overhead
I’ve been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I’ve been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can’t seem to move on

I’ve been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need em again someday
I’ve been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind
All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can’t make it through without a way back into love
Oh oh oh

I’ve been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I’ve been searching but I just don’t see the signs
I know that it’s out there
There’s got to be something for my soul somewhere
I’ve been looking for someone to shed some light
Not just somebody just to get me throught the night
I could use some direction
And I’m open to your suggestions

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can’t make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I’m hoping you’ll be there for me in the end
There are moments when I don’t know if it’s real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration Not just another negotiation

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can’t make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I’m hoping you’ll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I’ll be there for you in the end

We had our Practical Test in PE a while ago. FUTSAL, man. I love it. Haha. I made a goal! Weeee. ;P We were tie with the Pink Team, though. Good enough, isn't it? It was a nice game, indeed. :)


PE was before lunch. So obviously, since we played Futsal nga, I was really tired. After lunch was Filipino. I fell asleep during the class! Due to the hot weather, and boredom too. HAHA. I don't like it when it's hot.. :| I feel so kadiri eh.


I haven't been able to talk to or even text Lervicke these past few days. Well, we're just both busy I guess. ;))


I found two nice quotes, btw.. :)


I have come to realize that he's just a guy, a special one maybe, but he's not mine. I don't need to do things to make him love me again. If he wanted to, he would.


Love is the stupidest thing in the world and it doesn't mean a thing to me. Because tell me; what does love really do for you? It makes your heart pound 100 miles a minute, makes you cry yourself to sleep at night, makes you wait by the phone just to see if he'll call, makes you spend money on material things to cover up what's inside so that maybe he'll notice you. Love is full of Maybe's; it's never a sure thing. Love can be lost easily as it is found. Love can turn to hate, jealousy, and greed. Emotions are to be felt, acted upon; to be given and received; love isn't meant for that. It is only said and words mean nothing.


Aww. So trueee. :)) I miss him terribly. :|

My defense sucked. Poraaa. My powerpoint presentation didn't fucking work. Shit na yan. Tas tipong nakalimutan ko pa yung drafts ng Intro, Body, and Conclusion ko at home eh. I'm so stupppppppppppid. :((


But theeeen. I'm thankful na rin. At least I'm already done! Weeee. I'm not really expecting a high grade from Miss Lin. :)) Coz I am aware that I don't deserve naman talaga a high grade. ;]


Geom LT tomorrow. I haven't studied yet! Haha. Hafta go! :)

Oral defense starts tomorrow. Wish me luck, sweeties. :|

It's already 10:30 and I'm not yet done with my effing Powerpoint Presentation. How's that? :| Sucks, super.

Goodluck talaga sa'kin..

So, I haven't blogged for 6 days already! Haha, I'm so sorry.. A lot of school works are really keeping me busy. :| And btw, I'm the second out of forty students to present next week. Haaaa. Imagine that! Of all the other 38 students, why me? :((

But then.. After all those hell weeks, or months even, yesterday until just a while ago, my class had went to Bukal ng Tipan. It's located somewhere in Taytay, Rizal. Not that far from MC. :) We had our retreat.. finally! We were really supposed to have it last October pa, but due to Bagyong Milenyo(if I'm not mistaken), it was postponed. There.. I had a very good time. ;P And I'm sure that my classmates did, too.

I just wanna say thank you to everyone who made my life meaningful for the past 14 years.. :) I love you much much! ;D

Picturess!














More pictures here.